Ladies and Gentlemen… Mr Mike Walters

Downton has been pottering around in New Zealand scolding accomplished ex-England captains with “agendas” to lay off Moores and get behind the boys, which only goes to prove he hasn’t got a clue.

Win a few cricket matches, and the hounds will be kept on a leash. But don’t expect the travelling media corps to stage a line dance in grass skirts and pom-poms as cheerleaders for garbage, mate.

Read more here….

Sounds just like him, doesn’t it?

But Mike is coming in off the long run…

You cheerfully sacrificed England’s record scorer in all forms of the game, Mr Downton, and you appointed this bloke as coach. The day of reckoning is near when you will have to justify your abject leadership.

To date, your regime has produced a home Test series defeat by Sri Lanka when England should have won 2-0; an atrocious performance at Lord’s against India (when Alastair Cook’s bowlers squandered first use of a pitch greener than a stag night hangover); a fine comeback to win the series 3-1, although the Indians played like a side who couldn’t have cared less at Old Trafford and The Oval; firing your one-day captain days after publicly promising to stand by him; and this nuclear blow-out at the World Cup.

Don’t forget, the England and Wales Cricket Board drove a coach and horses through the fixture schedule, and heaped back-to-back Ashes series on their players, to accommodate six months of build-up to the World Cup in Australia and New Zealand. It’s worked out well, hasn’t it?

27 thoughts on “Ladies and Gentlemen… Mr Mike Walters

  1. ZeroBullshit Mar 1, 2015 / 4:41 pm

    At the bottom of Mike Walters’ article is this question:

    Is Peter Moores the right man to take the England cricket team forward?

    As I write, 42% believe he is.

    Where are these lunatics?


    • SimonH Mar 1, 2015 / 4:56 pm



      • ZeroBullshit Mar 1, 2015 / 5:01 pm



    • Annie Weatherly-Barton Mar 1, 2015 / 5:15 pm

      That’s what I thought. He’s a nice bloke it seems but we need someone with real credentials. Moores aint it. If people still want to say he’s the best person then I am left speechless.


    • Boz Mar 1, 2015 / 6:39 pm

      the barmy army


      • ZeroBullshit Mar 1, 2015 / 6:42 pm



      • ZeroBullshit Mar 1, 2015 / 7:40 pm

        Your involvement has obviously brought sanity into their minds Annie! 🙂


  2. metatone Mar 1, 2015 / 4:59 pm

    I think it’s worth noting, as always, that the comeback against India was at least in part about India’s thin bowling resources taking some injury hits.

    Not to say that England would not have won against the full lineup, but you can be damn sure if the series had gone the other way after injuries to Anderson and Broad, the mafia would be using that fact to defend Moores.


    • Rohan Mar 1, 2015 / 5:12 pm

      Ah but don’t forget that without Cook’s amazing 95 at Southampton, we would have been dead and buried………will read the Walter’s article later, the snippets sound great!


    • d'Arthez Mar 1, 2015 / 7:17 pm

      This is a point that is easily forgotten. India does not have too many suitable bowling options for tough overseas tours. A serious injury to Ishant Sharma, or Bhuvi Kumar really sets them back, to almost the same extent as England would suffer if Swann or Panesar could not play in India.

      For all the mocking that Ishant Sharma receives, and yes, he has an unflattering Test record, his experience is invaluable. Not many people will realize this, but domestically his first class bowling average is around 24, which is roughly the same as Vinay Kumar. Those among us who have seen Vinay Kumar in his only Test, will realize that there is a substantial disconnect between domestic and international cricket.

      The step up from domestic cricket to international cricket is extremely rough for Indian pacers, especially for away tours (just as English swing bowlers may struggle in Australia, or offies in Australia; conditions tend to be markedly different from home conditions, and often times less conducive too). Guys like Srinath or Zaheer Khan don’t come around too often.

      But at least you get the impression that the BCCI, for all its faults, is looking to address the issue. I don’t get the impression that the ECB is even remotely concerned with addressing similar issues with regards to bowling. Saker, for one is still employed.


  3. escort Mar 1, 2015 / 5:14 pm

    O Mother…..


  4. Annie Weatherly-Barton Mar 1, 2015 / 5:22 pm

    Good one me Lord. Great find. He doesn’t appear to be on Twitter which is a shame. Me gob was smacked by what Downton was doing to ex-players and captains? I wonder if he has read the stuff from Graves today? Probably still in bed!!! Apart from anything else Mr Downton has said going around ex-captains and giving them a rollicking just says it all about the twit. I’m trying to be polite here. The article is brilliant aye? Says most of the things that people on here, and on TFT, has said for months. He’s got some bottle and that’s for sure. Glad KP is not playing otherwise they would all be blaming him again. He’s better off out of it. Seen that damn thing from Pringle. Gee that windbag could make me lose my religion. Nasty miscreant. Selves’ piece today is not allowing comments. Well it did my heart good to read this piece it surely did.


  5. d'Arthez Mar 1, 2015 / 6:07 pm

    An excellent article. The kind of article that makes me actually more inclined to buy a physical copy of a newspaper. Because it is actually not corporate bollocks-speak or an apologia for it, but approaches the reader as a *gasp* intelligent subject. Who would have thought that such a model could actually work?

    Now just one more “good” result against Bangladesh, and the ECB might be forced into actually taking a decent decision. For the first time, since, what? 18 months?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Boz Mar 1, 2015 / 6:42 pm

      don’t underestimate corporate bollox – look where it’s got the country


      • Annie Weatherly-Barton Mar 1, 2015 / 7:33 pm

        Now ain’t that the truth. Don’t get me started on politics otherwise I drift into Orwell!!!


  6. Arron Wright Mar 1, 2015 / 8:07 pm

    You have to look carefully, or go to the last page, MS is now being mocked by middle-of-the-roaders like TheUtican and even posters like – gasp! – westcorkthinktank.


  7. Arron Wright Mar 1, 2015 / 8:18 pm

    This is too good not to share, sorry:

    Sameer ‏@Notacrickethack · 9 hrs9 hours ago
    @selvecricket do you think Zimbabwe have been more competitive than England?

    mike selvey ‏@selvecricket · 3 hrs3 hours ago
    @Notacrickethack no

    Sameer ‏@Notacrickethack · 3 hrs3 hours ago
    @selvecricket on what basis are you saying this because the scorecard is saying something else

    Zimbabwe have the same number of points from the same number of matches. They, like England, have lost all three games against the top eight and beaten an associate.

    Zimbabwe’s losing margins are 62 runs (v SA), 73 runs (D/L, v WI) and 20 runs (v Pak).
    England’s are 111 runs (v Aus), 9 wickets with 226 balls remaining (v NZ) and 9 wickets with 16 balls remaining (v SL).


    • Rohan Mar 1, 2015 / 8:52 pm

      That is brilliant. Considering Selvey is such a supporter of The ECB and ‘Once in a Generation’ Moore’s, you would think he would really appreciate those stats, after all this is one of ‘Once in a Generations’ favourite methods, stats, stats, stats, that’s the way to coach and win. Oh, except, oops, these stats show we are not very good……….

      Just watched the verdict on Sky and all of this Pietersen stuff is really in full flow again. Pietersen was interviewed by Colville and was very complimentary (obviously) of Groves and Harrison. It definitely seemed like part PR exercise on his part to lay the foundations for a return to team England, he also commented on the players apparent over reliance on stats. He made a very good point, however, about how historic stats are irrelevant as the game has changed significantly in the last few years……..

      Lastly, Annie, I was also shocked to see/ read that Downton had been chastising previous captains for their criticism of Moore’s, just appalling……….


      • d'Arthez Mar 2, 2015 / 12:44 am

        It would have been so much more fun re-reading comments in addition to the article. When people could have been reminded of the modest expectations they had, and how Moores has failed to live up to just about every positive expectation imaginable, with the accidental exception of the Test series against India (where it can be argued that a breakdown in the relationship between the bowlers and the coach resulted in victory; cf. Anderson’s comment on the change in bowling tactics) – and even then, the ignomy of that Lord’s …


      • d'Arthez Mar 2, 2015 / 1:17 am

        Scrap that. I missed the original comments, due to all the clutter on site. Is this BETA being used for dodgy psychological research?


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